Confession: I Was Once A Stripper

I have a major blog crush on Kathy from Vodka And Soda, so I decided to have a little confess sesh with her. Plus it always feel good to have a little confession.

I confess...I was an English major, but I couldn't teach you how to use grammar. My major mostly focused on Literature, so I could read and I write a damn good research paper {IMO}, but if you asked me to break down the nouns/adjectives/adverbs, past participles, or sentence structure I use, I would not be smarter than a fifth grader. I have saved my textbooks from ENC101-02, which means there is hope. One day, I will refresh those old skills that I bluffed my way through.

I confess... I found wine from my favorite vineyard in Napa and bought six bottles, and then saw my favorite ketchup at Kooter Brown's and stole one. Yep, you read that right...I took that ish from the table and stuffed it in my purse. Basically, I'm a lush that enjoys her lycopene. I guess you could say I'm a tidge bit of a ketchup freak that usually uses Heinz, but I just can't say no to Monarch Ketchup!

I confess... I had more fun with my Grandma at the senior center than I have in a long while. I mean, the sex talks made me blush, but as they pointed out- I'm married too.

I confess... I still run to Grandma's house when I'm having a bad day. It's THE best thing in the world, and I spent a whole day last week with BOTH Grandmas. It will go down in history as one of the best days of my life.

And last, but not least...

I confess... I was once a stripper. You see, someone at the grocery store once put a quarter in my diaper, and apparently, I got a kick out of it. From then on, all the cashiers would pass baby-me around and fill my diaper with change each time we visited the grocery store. Dad said he made out like a bandit, and just made sure my diaper was a fresh one before we went in. Don't hate the playa hate the game.

Poor Maddy will have to find some other way to pay for college, because she doesn't like ANYTHING in her diaper. Little miss priss is lucky she's so darn cute ;)

What's on your mind to confess? It's okay if you confess you want to steal Maddy. I wouldn't judge you for it, because I want to take her back to Enterprise with me ;)