Some People Probably Hate Me

Recently, I read Sarah's post about 32 Things I Hate More Than April 1st, and while I giggled at most of it. It got me to thinking. I know that her list was all in fun, but I see people saying they 'hate' so much stuff via social media, and since I do some of those things, they must hate me too. Do you ever feel that way?

Originally, I wanted to talk about this when I read 20 Things Your Friends Wish You Would Stop Posting On Facebook, but I wondered if I was the only one that disagreed with some of it. Let's use the following, for example:

"Holy announcement overload

Of course you can update your status when you get engaged, married or have a baby, but you don’t need to inundate your friends’ newsfeeds with photos of fabulous parties, quotes about love and anticipations about family life. There’s a fine line between sharing your good news and rubbing it in everyone’s face."

I have never once thought that someone on my Facebook, or a blogger for that matter, was trying to rub their fun life in my face. I just don't think like that. I think 'Wow...Look at so and so living it up, and embracing life!' or 'Congrats for whatever awesomeness is happening!' Maybe I'm naive, but I don't see where it's my place to read into what they are posting and why they are posting it, and it's DEFINITELY not my place to dictate what they are sharing. Who knows, maybe I'm an over-sharer...anyone reading who's an FB friend of mine...don't tell me, haha. I'd like to stay naive. Here are some things that I know I do, and I'm not a bit ashamed:

I take pictures of food.

I LOVE food. I love food I make, I love food from restaurants, I love seeing other pictures of food that people post. Yes, they should be pretty/appetizing pictures, but I'm all for them.

I love PDA (PG Rated of course)

I don't mind hashtags.

I don't ever want to have twenty per post or picture, but I think they are a neat-o idea. Especially on Instagram. I think it's fabulous I can find #fitness or #fashion inspiration so easily, and some hashtags are hilarious.

I like selfies.

Okay, so I actually don't post many selfies with just me in them, but I love sharing pictures of me with friends or family. I used to always be the one behind the camera and have years worth of pictures that are of travels or people I love, but I was never in them. I don't always want that to be the case. I love looking back at a picture that holds a special moment with myself and that person...like Lauren. Now that she's gone, I look at these #selfies, and it still connects me to her. Don't hate on people's selfies because you don't know what they mean to that person. Just not ten a day, people.

I post baby pictures of my nieces, so just imagine if I had my own kid...

I post fitness pictures, and have even checked in at the gym!

If I feel so inclined, I will pass on inspiration.

 I will never be the kind of person that shares 10 inspirational memes or quotes a day, but I won't judge others for doing it. I just hide them from my newsfeed.

And there are even things outside of social media:

"Same Side Sitting", as Miss Venus put it.

Will and I sit across from each other 8 out of 10 times, but sometimes I just want to snuggle next to him while we wait for our food. Holding hands across the table doesn't always cut it, and yes, we are those people that hold hands 98% of the time we are near each other. It's why we have great stress management.

I'm cheap.

Sure being frugal isn't cool, and no one wants to hear that they need to quit shopping and buying lattes, but I would rather be able to provide for our future {possible} children, know that we are taken care of for retirement, and have a fat savings account in the bank, than spend money on random stuff. I have had friends that practically get mad that I don't want to do something stupid with my money or buy their {insert multi-level marketing product here}. Not saying I won't buy something every now and then, but don't 'hate' me if I don't.
I'm not politically correct.

Along with telling you that you need to quit spending money on stupid stuff if you complain to me that you have no savings, I will tell you if you have a booger, I will answer any question honestly (but kindly) even if it's not what you want to hear, and I will flat out tell you that you are wrong if I must. However, I don't judge anyone and I take into account that everyone makes mistakes, which is why people keep excepting my honest opinion {I guess}. Politically correctness is the popular thing these days, but honesty is my policy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I hate things like child/pet abusers, pedophiles, and dirty politicians, and I don't think we should waste 'hate' on our friends for what they post on Facebook or their blog. Let's focus on celebrating the passions of others instead of bashing them. Mmmmkay? You may see a food picture as 'non-picture worthy', but the person posting it is sharing their passion with you. You don't want anyone to stifle your passions, so don't do it to them. Promote what you love instead of bashing what you hate, and treat others how you would like to be treated. It's as complicated and simple as that.

Sorry for the deep post, but let's remember I'm 'sexually deprived for your freedom' right now. Gotta get my 'frustration' out somewhere!

Somebody Is Trying To Steal Our Money!

I say "somebody" because it happens to be a department of the government, and I don't need them flagging me for airing their dirty laundry. Let's refer to them as the "Check Eaters". You know, the ones that take most of your pay before you even see your check?

Source: Uploaded by user via Janna on Pinterest

Now I accept the fact that they eat our checks. We elected all the fools that put us in this economic spot, so there is no way around it at this juncture. What I can't accept, is when the Check Eaters try to steal from soldiers and their families. Allow me to explain...

When a soldier deploys, the money that they make during their deployment is tax free as a little perk for putting their lives on the line. Fair enough? So we did our taxes this year, got a little money back and were happy as a lark. Then all of a sudden, the Check Eaters in Virginia (our home of residence) decided that we should be taxed on a portion of the money Will made while he was deployed. Now I could see this as a mistake if they tried to tax him on all of the income, but how does a trained Check Eater look at a soldiers W-2, see income that is non-taxable, and decide that he should pay taxes on a portion of that. He's all like, "For shits and giggles, let's see if these suckers will pay this."

Um...no.

So what did we do? We called and explained ourselves to Check Eaters that acted like they had never come across a situation like this. They had no clue that we shouldn't be taxed or so they said, made us send them his W-2 again, and said they would review it. Cue to a few weeks later and we got ANOTHER letter saying that we owed the money PLUS penalties.

Um...what?

We called AGAIN. This time, they searched their office for his W-2, and found that it had not been "reviewed" yet. So let's get this straight...

1) They don't know how to do their jobs.

2) They just tell people they owe random amounts of money.

3) They assess penalties when they are the ones that are too busy to review W-2's.

We are pretty sure that they are going to review it and we will be off the hook, but think about how many times the Check Eaters tell people they owe money after they have already filed, and how many people just pay it because they assume that a Government Agency would not try to screw you.

Moral of the story:
ALWAYS second guess it when someone tells you that you owe money after the fact. Especially when that someone is a "Check Eater". It could save you hundreds of dollars. You're welcome.

Apparently, We're Getting Old.

Well, I'd say 60% of us?
I mean, I know there are a LOT of bloggers that haven't even hit the drinking age yet, but I think we still outnumber them. Right? No judgement, teeny boppers. I love to see you playing the field, doing beer bongs, and giving you hangover tips, but I am VERY happy that social media was basically non-existent during my party phase.

Anywho, I saw this little list of "Signs That Your Almost 30", and was inspired to write my own. All of the following have happened to me in the past month or so {no joke}, and I just HAD to share in the hopes that I'm not the only one. I'm not, right...?

1) Your friends start tagging their children on Facebook when they are in trouble.

2. Everyone is running marathons, aka... everyone's metabolism is slowing down.

3. You don't want to pay exorbitant amounts of money to see artists in concert that you have already seen. Probably multiple times.

4. Every time you talk to someone younger, you shake your head and "When I was your age..." comes out before you can even stop it.

5. You watch old movies and realize that you are now older than all your favorite characters. The ones that you used to look "up" to.

6. When a loud band comes out, happy hour is over and it's bed time.

7. Your husband ends up with strange tan lines now that you are obsessed with skin protection. Yep, this totally happened recently. If only there were pictures...

8. You sign up for Equifax.

9. You realize that you are past the point where you thought you would be done popping out babies, you are kid free, and you don't even bat an eyelash.

10. You are about to go on vacation, and you look for deals because there is no way that you will be crashing on everyone's couch the whole time or staying in motel hell.

Source: stacyablephotography.zenfolio.com via Janna on Pinterest

We are TOTALLY staying there soon soon...EEEEEEK!

11. You are too old for the Juniors section, but too young for everything else.

Word to the wise...we are ALL too old for Hollister and Aeropostale.

12. Gluten free is your new motto.

13. The car radio is set to the Easy Listening station, so you have no clue who the artists are on the POP stations. If you can even call them artists...

14. You plan to run errands on the way to date night, so that you don't talk yourselves into having "Date Night In", instead.

15. You'd rather die than have a hangover.

16. Our parents were younger than we are now when they got pregnant, but somehow we turned out okay. However, 16 And Pregnant is still ridonkulous.

17. It takes longer to warm up than the actual work out.

18. You feel it's your duty to skool the children.

19. You only pack one pair of heels for a 10 day vacation, and you may not even wear them.

20. Someone brings their kids over, you can't figure out the Playstation trying to put on a DVD, and the five year old finally asks for the remote and does it for you.

21. You let a toddler play with your phone because it's locked, and the next thing you know, the kid is calling China. I can't even put the code in right myself! WTF?

22. If you have to go out, then you demand to barhop because sitting at one club is way too boring. Been there, done that, steer clear of the creepers.

23. A trip to the grocery store takes twice as long because you actually read the labels and you have to organize your coupons before you hit the register.

24. Your best friend tags you with stuff like this on Pinterest:

Source: nickmom.com via Dani on Pinterest

We even dedicate boards to each other. We are special.

25. Movies like Dark Night give you heart palpitations and bad dreams.

26. You carry a water bottle with you everywhere. Especially while imbibing.

27. Finding Kale Chips on sale is the highlight of your day.

28. And the realization that Whole Foods and Organics are really worth the money.

29. Your husband that used to overdraft his account on the regular, warns you that the checking account is "low" when the balance drops below $1,000. I've taught you well, babe!

30. Everyone on your Friends List has reposted the link to the 30 Signs You're Almost 30.

Am I right or am I right?

How Do You Score As An Adult?

I know that we have sent out emails, facebooked, and tweeted that the link up is moved to next week, but in case you didn't get the memo...The link up is moved to DECEMBER 20TH! I know, I know, I'm just as anxious as you, but the extra anticipation will be worth it.

I am just happy that only one day stands in the way of another blissful weekend with my love. One that is starting off with Will making me dinner and date night in. We are stocked up on wood so there will most definitely be a fire, and maybe we will even do chocolate fondue with roasted roasted marshmallows again. It happens to be my favorite fireside activity... Well, at least my favorite that involves food. ;)

Speaking of food:

Source: perceptioniseverything.blogspot.com via Janna on Pinterest

Maybe this isn't the best option, but it was when there weren't many sweets in the house and that craving occurred.  I saw the WW Turtle Sundae in the freezer and knew that it wouldn't leave me satisfied, so I whipped up the brownie and a la mode it was! It was the perfect amount and worth every bite. Go try it. Don't just take my word for it!

I found this through Kristine a few weeks ago, and just had to see how I scored.

Source: harpias.tumblr.com via Janna on Pinterest

Job (1P) Business Card (1P) Laptop (1P) Live with Parents (-2P) Engaged (1P) Married (2P) Divorced (3P) Kids (2P) House (2P) Car (1P) Minivan (2P) Cottage/Boat (2P) Dog (1P) Loan (1P) Credit Card (1P) Maxed Out Credit Card (-3P) Airmiles (1P) Savings Account (1P) Dishwasher (1P) Sewing Machine (2P) King Size Bed (1P) Actually Cooking (2P) Slippers (1P) Grey Hair (1P) Cellulites (1P) Morning Paper (1P) Video Games (-1P) Choose to not pick up the phone (2P) Tattoo (-1P) Degree (1P) Mugshot (-2P) Casual Sex (-2P) Double Date (1P) Wine Tasting (1P) Beer Keg (-1P) Weight Watchers (2P) Casual Friday (1P) Walking Just For Fun (1P) Cruise (3P) High School Reunion (1P) Odd Piercings (-2P)

My Total Adult Points: 28

0 – 15 Points: Cut Your Hair and Get a Job!

16 – 29 Points: It’s all downhill from here

30 – 46 Points: Moving To Florida?

As you can see, "It's all downhill from here", but really I think it should say "You've reached your prime!" Then there's also the fact that I don't feel like an adult WHATSOEVER.
I can't believe that I do all these adult things, and then I will forget that I'm old enough to drink or to even pop out kids. Although, I'm sure that if we do have kids people will look at me and think "babies having babies". Judgmental schmucks. Joke will be on them when I tell them that I'm 30+ (remember this is IF we have kids).

Source: thefancy.com via Janna on Pinterest

I don't know if I will ever feel like an adult, but that is just fine with me.
I want to be like my parents; drinking beers on the porch after work, traveling, and rockin' out harder than we do at concerts. They are proof that that there doesn't have to be a downhill.

What are your Adult Points?

On My Heart: Humility

Yesterday was the BEST day off.
When Will asked me what I was going to do on my day off, I was happy to have "absolutely nothing" on the top of my to-do list. I was able to blog, answer emails, and work on some buttons/graphics. ALL from the comfort of my bed.

One important thing I did, was spill my guts write this here little post.
It was actually much longer (and much more in depth), but I realized that the writing itself was therapeutic and there was no need to rehash the entire story on le blog. I know I know, we all love the juicy stuff, and still...I decided less is more.
{FYI: This is not a pity party. Just showing that we all struggle}

Whether we are in the real world or blog world, we all face judgement and unkind situations.

If I'm quiet, I'm a snob.
If I'm vocal, I'm full of myself.
If I'm honest, I'm a b*tch.
If I'm nice, I'm fake.
You know the drill.

When I'm feeling weak, I wonder if it really is me.
Lately, I've been feeling especially weak.
I think it's because I had gotten to the point of this deployment where I felt like Will's homecoming was too good to be true. I've been without him for so long that his homecoming seemed like a fantasy.

Suffering in silence was my first mistake.
 I was allowing my thoughts to play tricks on me, and since I was essentially alone, I was left to my own devices. I think that with the combination of feeling alone, feeling hurt, and a little insanity brought on by this deployment, I fell victim to my own insecurities.

The last week has been spent doing a lot of introspection.
I have gone over the people that I have allowed in my life, my work situations, and what my future holds. It was actually inspired by a few negative events, but has turned out incredibly positive. I think I must have simply been due for one of those life altering events that give us direction. What inspired this, is not important because each of us comes to different road blocks. What is important, is that we all learn that sometimes, those road blocks are a wake up call that show us we need to redirect our course.

Source: inspiringshortstories.org via Janna on Pinterest

Seriously...It's like that pin was meant for me.

It came to me in all of it's Pinterest glory and inspiration, reminding me that this is what life is all about. It's filled with ups, downs, and lessons to be learned.
How we maneuver through those lessons are what defines who we are.

Source: perceptioniseverything.blogspot.com via Janna on Pinterest

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What matters to me, is that I have a handful of amazing people in my life, my husband as my rock, and now I have all of you for support and inspiration. I have yet to figure out what my final destination will be, but I know that I am on the right path.

Source: happiestaretheprettiest.tumblr.com via Britt on Pinterest

A few lessons in closing:
Everyone is going to make their own opinions about each individual, so all you can do is put your best foot forward, admit when you are wrong, and ask for forgiveness when you should.
Always remember that YOU don't want to be misjudged, so please remember that there are always two sides of a story and that you should simply treat others how you would like to be treated.

Perhaps the biggest lesson I learned, and the hardest, was that I'm not perfect, I can fall short, and I can make a bad decision or judgement just like ANYONE else. People expect a lot from me and I expect even more, which is why I needed to learn this lesson. A lesson in humility.

Baller On A Budget: Janna's Budget Breakdown!

In appreciation for helping me reach our first goal on our Facebook Page, I am now going to teach you how to be a baller on a budget! Don't ask me how I learned this, because other than the desire to be financially stable- I had no direction.  As a matter of fact, before I met my husband, I was livin' the high life.  I had very minimal bills in college, so most of the money I made went to fun in the sun and traveling wherever I wanted, whenever I wanted. Yes, I was one of "those people" that had college paid for, but I also worked hard to get scholarships, had sometimes up to three jobs, and NEVER asked my family for money. It wasn't that I couldn't ask them or that I needed to work three jobs; It was that I had an innate drive to work hard and play harder.  I feel very blessed to have that drive.

Fast forward to the end of college and the beginning of our relationship, and life started getting put in perspective.  At this point, I had NO DEBT. I had credit cards, but they were paid off regularly, and obviously no student loans.  Will, on the the other hand, was a totally different story.  He had the student loans, other loans, credit card debt, AND was helping to support his roommate that got laid off. I'm not gonna lie- that all scared the bejeesus out of me, and made me want to run.

To be honest, he was probably better off than most guys our age, but to someone who had no debt- It was quite off-putting. So guess what? We started cutting back.
GASP. We sacrificed? Yes. Because that's how you fix it.
It's not like we didn't have any fun, we just found cheaper ways to have it.  I remember a lot of Publix picnics, and you know what? I will forever hold those memories fondly in my heart. At this point we didn't know anything about budgeting, but we knew that we had to cut back.  It doesn't take a genius to realize that if you are spending more than you make, you are going to add to the debt, and in order to lessen the debt, you need to spend under your means. Unless your game plan is to win the lottery. Sorry to burst your bubble, but that ain't going to happen.

So let's fast forward a bit. Within a year, we had ALREADY paid off all the credit cards and had a good hold on the loans. Gosh darn did that feel good. Then we realized that the older we get, the higher the bills were going to be. Not to mention- there was going to need to be a ring purchased in the near future and a wedding.  This is when we really buckled down.

At the time we were both making cash, so each week we would divide our money into two envelopes holding our savings and bills.  We had set amounts for each item of our budget (based on goals we set for ourselves), and then what we made ABOVE all of those goals was our "fun money". Let me tell you, that fun money feels like you won the lottery.  You don't have to feel guilty about it, since you are reaching your budgeting goals, and that is the best feeling in the world.

As time went on we became more and more streamlined, but our budget also began to fluctuate and change.  When Will enlisted, we had to become more structured based on a set pay and a real paycheck.  This means that the envelopes wouldn't work anymore.

So what did I do? I figured out how to adapt it to our new situation.

I took this:

And made one big list:
*This is not our exact list, but a generalized guide for everyone*


Necessities:
Rent/Mortgage $1,000
Electricity/Water $150
Gas bill $50
Groceries $300
Gas $400
Car Insurance $200
Life Insurance $30
Trash $15

Savings & Loan:
Student Loan $100
Investments $400
Savings $300
Vacation Fund $150

Extra Expenses:
Cable/Internet $105
Cell Phone $100
Misc.$50
-----------------------------
Total: $3,350

Now some of you may not invest or deposit into savings every month, which would subtract about $1,500, but then you might have other expenditures like car payments, daycare, tuition, home owner taxes, etc. Point is- you create your budget based on EXACTLY what you spend. In order to have a fully functioning budget it needs to be very specific.  You also need to know your BOTTOM LINE, which is how much income your household is bringing in each month. If that number is smaller than the amount you are spending each month, then you are in BIG TROUBLE.
You will have to cutback, no ifs, ands, or buts about it. You basically need to subtract your necessities from your monthly income, and prioritize from there. I personally find savings and loans to be equally as important, so they were also initially figured in.

Let's say your bottom line line is $45,000 based on the Median Household Income:
$45,000/12 mo.= $3,750
If you apply that to the budget breakdown, that leaves you $400 in Fun Money. Woohoo!

Now what really happens when we apply this?
Well for us- this number wouldn't work for us.  We invest 20% of our income, and put another 20% of our income into savings, so THEN we subtract our necessities, and what is left is applied to our extra expenses.  We have a decent dual income, and I REFUSE to be the type of people that spend more the more we make.  As our income has grown, so has our savings and investments.

40%+45%= 15% leftover for Fun $
15% of $45,000 = $6,750...Sounds like a good time to me!

For you we will do it like a Choose Your Own Adventure:
Option A
If your  Monthly Bills & Savings are under your budget- AWESOME.
But then decide what you would need to do to invest and/or put more money in savings.
+You need to have, at the very least, a three month padding in your Savings
(which would = approx. $10,000)
+You need to figure out how much per month needs to be invested for your future retirement.
(A typical IRA maxes out at $5,000/year- $416/mo.)
Apply these new numbers to your budget and adjust accordingly.

Would you rather drink your Starbucks and get your nails done or have Savings and a Retirement?
Priorities people.

Option B
If your Monthly Bills & Savings are over your budget- CRAP.
Where are we going wrong?
Brand new cars, overpaying in rent, expensive hair styles, vacations that aren't budgeted...
You can get sucked into all of these things EASILY.
What you have to decide is do you like falling farther into debt in the hopes that you will eventually catch up, or would you rather lower your blood pressure by re-prioritizing.
I know that when we moved to Colorado- all of our savings went out the window and we hadn't begun investing yet, so I was a basket case. I knew that in order to de-stress and happy again, we HAD to prioritize. Now it has only been a year, and we are EXACTLY where I want to be.
Don't you wish that you could say that?

If you are nodding your head yes, then here are some ideas:
+Begin pricing things like Insurance, trash, cell phone providers, and cable.
We have cut $3,000/year by switching all of our providers or consolidating.
(That's more than half of your IRA!)
+Cut some coupons!
HELLO! It's FREE $ people!
I don't even clip a lot. I just go through and clip the ones I know we need and I save at least $5 per grocery store visit. $10 if you count buying what's on the store sale ads.
$10 x Your Grocery trips for the year= At least $240.
+Don't buy the newest car, upgrade to the newest iPhone every time they come out, or get pedi/mani's every two weeks. I'm sure some of you think I am crazy, but I think you are the crazy ones for allowing your life to be controlled by material things.
One time, I was chatting with my dad, and I added up what I watched my friends spend on Vices: Alcohol, cigarettes, mani/pedi's, fancy hairstylists/colorists, new technology, new cars, etc., and at MINIMUM I spend over $10,000 a year less.
Not to mention, I am not consumed by all of these "things".
It's freeing people...Try it sometime.
Once you have conquered your expenditures (I KNOW that you can do it), you can
 refer to Option A. That's your goal, my dears. Change your life.
______________________________________________________________________

Do you all think I'm crazy by now? If you even made it to this point....
I'm ok if you think I'm crazy, because I am happier and more at peace than I have ever been. I never thought that you could be truly "Financially Stable" without a six figure income, but I am happy to be proof that you can. Now I have to go plan for my next vacay in two weeks, which has already been budgeted for! That makes for a REAL stress free vacation.

A Parable to Live By

This was my inspiration this morning from my pal Ryan Spear over at Clear Channel...Hopefully it gets me through hump-day and the rest of the week!

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do.

Finally he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway, it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey. He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They each grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement, he quieted down. A few shovel loads later, the farmer looked down the well, and was astonished at what he saw. As every shovel of dirt hit his back, the donkey did something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.

As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed, as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and trotted off.

The Moral:

Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles a stepping stone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up!

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1.Free your heart from hatred.

2.Free your mind from worries.

3.Live simply.

4.Give more.

5.Expect less.

O.K., that's enough of that B.S. ... The donkey later came back, caught the farmer out in the field and kicked the snot out of him. Then he went over to each of his neighbors farms and kicked the snot out of them too for helping.

The REAL Moral:

When you try to cover your ass, it always comes back to get you.

I am proud to say that I harbor no hate, I try not to worry about people and events that do not deserve my effort, I live very simply (with a little flair of course), I give my all to family friends and work and I try not to expect too much, so as not to be let down all too often...If everyone could live like this- we could all be a lil' happier ;)

T.I.P.S- To Insure Proper Service. It's Not 1950 Anymore People!

Would you try to pay your grocery store less for your groceries just because you don't have the money? 

 Could you call your cable company and tell them that you will "get them next time", because you are low on cash this month?

 NO YOU WOULDN'T, and as a matter of fact you couldn't.  

So why then, does it become "ok" to not tip your server, and more importantly not tip them at least 18%?  

That is the minimum standard accepted ammount to be paid when you receive good service and based on the cost of living that's the LOWEST it should be.  For those of you that have never worked in the service industry, you need to look at it through our eyes and realize that if you don't tip us appropriately, WE DON'T MAKE $$!  I don't know how people think we pay our bills when they leave us nothing.  Now I know sometimes you will get a bad server and I'm not talking about that.  I'm talking to the ignorant people that tip 10-15% across the board, regardless of service and the people that think that just because they're low on cash, it's ok to "get us next time."  Again, I will reiterate-  you wouldn't try to pay less than expected for you groceries or bills, so you SHOULDN'T try to pay your server less!  

Now you can say, "If you don't like it then quit and get a 'real' job" (I've heard that one a lot lol), but my response to you is- "If you can't afford to tip, then STAY OUTA MY RESTAURANT and cook and clean for yourself!"  See how you like it when you have to do it yourself and not get paid.  How do you feel when you slave over the stove for your own family and they don't thank you? 

 I stumbled upon a few key lessons on appropriate behavior for YOU THE CONSUMER, when you visit us in the restaurants.  If you would like us to keep giving you appropriate service, then you need to give us the appropriate RESPECT! 

Source: imgfave.tumblr.com via Janna on Pinterest

Take these as Lesson #1:

The next time you're out eating at a resturant, look at your server. Do you think they are really happy to be doing that job? The answer is no, they are not, but it's what we do, and we do it for the money so please help them out. It's a tougher job than you think and you should pay them accordingly!

There are SO many people out there flooding the restaurants w/o any knowledge of how to tip, and it is extremely frustrating. Here is a short guide for the general public to follow. Feel free to print out and store in your wallet and/or purse.

1. CHILDREN "THE LITTLE DEVILS":

If you have children, DO NOT let them, open and dump anything on the table (ie; salt, sugar, etc). IF YOU DO, you must leave an extra $5 for the server to clean up YOUR CHILD'S mess & to restock the now unusable wasted items. We are neither their babysitter nor their parent. The least you can do is pay us for the extra work. Also make sure you control your kids and don't let them scream or run around the restraunt. It's very distracting and rude to others eating, not to mention dangerous if they get ran over by a server with hot food in their hands.

2. "THE CAMPERS":

If you feel the necessity to stay for longer than 15 minutes after you pay, its an extra $3 every 30 minutes. We make our money from the tables. If you are in one and we can't seat it, we don't make money. Not to mention, if you are our last table we have to wait for you to leave before we can leave.

3. COMPLIMENTS:

Telling a server they are the best server they've ever had is not a tip. If we are good, let us know by leaving us more money. We cant pay our bills on compliments. Its not that we don't appreciate the praise, its just that if you say that and then leave 10% it's an insult.

4. THE SALVATION PAMPHLETS:

Prayer cards and any other religious pamphlet is NOT a tip. It is insulting that you assume we are w/o religion and must save us. Again, like ..3, we can't pay bills w/prayer cards. We'd go to church on Sundays if it wasn't mandatory to work on Sundays because EVERYONE who goes to church follows it by eating out.

5. TIPPING:

It is not 1960. Cost of living has gone up dramatically since then. 18% is the MINIMUM amount of what you should be tipping your servers. Look at the first number of your bill. ie. if your bill is $30, double the 3 & you have a $6 tip. If the second number is more than 5 however, you must add a dollar. Remember, our companies pay us minimum wage which is $2.13. And we are taxed on 15 percent of your meal automatically anyway. So if your meal is $100 and you leave $10 and we tip out $4-5 to the busser, bartender, and whoever else then we pay tax on 10 dollars and we make $5. It seems small but it adds up. How many times do you eat out per week and do this?

6. THE COMPLAINERS:

If you get a discount because your food was prepared wrong or something, do not take it out of our tip. We didn't cook it. The cooks get paid hourly regardless if the food sucks. However, we only make what you give us.

7. THE FREE STUFF:

If you happen to get anything for free and you did not have a problem with your dining experience, most of the time it is because the server thinks you will realize that they are giving it to you for free. There should be extra tip thanking the server for the free item. They could get in a lot of trouble giving away free stuff. You should give them hazard pay for it.

8. THE LATE ONES:

If you come into the restraunt 10 mins before closing or any time near closing hurry up and order your food and get out. Closed means closed, not social hour. It is so rude to sit there and take your sweet ass time. We can't leave until you leave because we have to do sidework and clean the table you are sitting at. We don't want to stand there waiting for you for an extra hour just because you don't want to go home. We recommend 24 hour establishments such as Dennys if you wish to sit into the wee hours of the night.

9. THE TABLE HOGGERS:

If you only come in for coffee or a dessert, to do paper work, or to have a meeting, don't sit there taking up our booths for hours. We are not Starbucks or a hotel restraunt. If you want to sit for hours, go there or else you better leave a good tip for us and camping fee included.

10. THE GREET:

When we come up to the table to greet you and we ask how you are doing, please let us know. We honestly want to know how you are doing. And ask us how we are doing as well. It's called manners. If you are in a bad mood we want to know that from the beginning. A confused stare or complete silence does not suffice as a reply to "How are you doing?". Also most of us are REQUIRED to say certain things during the greeting, so please don't interrupt our greeting and say "I want coffee", "Can we get some bread?", or "What are the soups?" Just sit tight for a damn minute & let us talk. You're not helping us out & saving us time by stopping our greet, you are pissing us off.

11. THOSE DAMN CELL PHONES:

Don't ever talk on your cell phone in a restaurant. This is probably the rudest thing to do. If you must be on your cell, at least keep your voice down in respect for other customers. If you are on your cell phone when we walk up to greet your table we will walk away and not return until you get off your phone. Just show some respect and give us your attention for a couple of minutes.

12. THE PICKY PEOPLE:

When you're taken to a table, sit there. There's a reason you were taken to that table and it's because that server is next on the rotation. If you prefer a certain table, section, window seat etc. specify that to the host/hostess BEFORE they walk you to your table!! Don't wait till they get to the VERY back of the restaraunt then ask "can we have a booth?" "Can we sit by the window?" No! The reason you weren't sat by the window or in a booth is most likely because the server by the window or the server with the booths just got sat and you will receive better service if you stay put. If you ask BEFOREHAND the hostess has time to sit you accordingly. They have time to find you a table where you will be happy to sit AND receive good service!

13. THE WAVERS:

If you wave at me or try to talk to me while I am talking to another table or have a huge tray in my hand, I WILL ignore you. We have other people besides you to take care of and unless we are standing still or hanging out by a computer, we are doing something. It is rude to think we will stop what we are doing for one table just to come help you. Let me put this heavy ass tray down in the middle of the dining room to find out you want more sauce. Do not grab me, or wave, or shake your glass, or call me ma'am or waiter or any other pet-name you want to call me because you were on your cell, or talking, or interrupted my initial greet where I told you my damn name!

You know you're a server when.....

1. You know that "in the weeds" is NOT a camping term.

2. You cant decide who you hate more: kids, old people, teenagers, or foreigners

3. You're pissed if you got a $10 tip on a $60 check.

4. You can figure out 20% like nobodys business.

5. You heavily debate putting on a gratuity for a big party. And may call in a second opinion to evaluate the table.

6. You're familiar with the signature cocktail: water with lemon.

7. You don't have any idea what the special is and could care less.

8. When you go out to eat, you over analyze everything your server does. And even if they screw up you still tip at least 20%.

9. You hang out at the server table.

10. You know about all your co-workers sex lives and drug habits. And you participate in one or the other; or both!

11. You know what the most dreaded side work is and how to avoid getting stuck with it.

12. Same goes for the death section.

13. You understand the importance of booths.

14. You know that an over cooked steak is the worst re-cook ever.

15. You want to kill the kitchen when they have 30 minute ticket times.

16. You will take the long way around just to avoid your table.

17. You hate making desserts.

18. You get weeded waiting forever for the bar to pour you a freakin beer.

19. You live out of your car.

20. You always have cash on you, yet you're always broke.

21. Your cash is usually still in your book days after you worked.

22. You know who sells the good drugs.

23. You never know what happened to the wine key.

24. You become a nocturnal creature.

25. Everybody on a Sunday AM shift has a hangover.

26. The busser is never around when you need him.

27. Getting cut does not equal getting out.

28. You need a manager card to wipe your ass!

29. A mess up is always appreciated by the starving servers...

30. And you're all like a bunch of vultures when it happens!

31. When in doubt-you go with medium.

32. You use the term 86 in regular conversation. Yet you have no idea where it came from.

Thank you for reading!

TGAAD- I'm Making The Commitment!

In the state of our Economy, a "Consumer Diet" sounds pretty necessary.

What is a "Consumer Diet" you ask? 

 It is a movement that has begun within circles of people that hope to lessen their carbon footprints and/or lessen their spending.  With an economy such as ours, some are practicing out of necessity, while others are pledging to go green in hopes to better our earth. All of the Diets were interesting, but The Great American Apparel Diet was the one that appealed the most to me.  TGAAD is a pledge to not buy ANY new clothes for one year, and here is my reasoning that I posted on TGAAD once my profile was officially activated!

I have been seeing different sites and blogs that suggest “consumer diets” and have slowly built an interest.  At first I thought “Good for them!”, then I started thinking “Could be fun…” and now I’m thinking “I can do this!!”  I do shop very frugally, enjoying the hunt for sales and thrifting, but have now turned my focus towards home decor and cooking, so why not just cut out buying clothes altogether? I have a whole closet room-so no need to purchase more clothes, my hubby and I have begun our financial planning for investing and retirement-so I can contribute more toward that with the money I save and honestly I think it’ll do me good to face this challenge.  I would like to believe that I am not a materialistic person by nature and this will be proof to me that I have my priorities in order and am not consumed by consumerism.

  Unfortunately, I am a late joiner since the Diet was started last August (2010) and ends this coming August (2011), but I plan to make it to the end of their year and hopefully continue until next March, so that I do it for a full year! Even if you join late, you are only on the hook for the duration of their countdown, and for most, that is probably the loop hole you were looking for, but if you really want to test yourself then do the WHOLE YEAR!

Check it out- here!

Be inspired and pass it along!