We Conquered The Choctawhatchee River!

As soon as I heard we were moving to Fort Rucker, summertime tubing was the FIRST thing that came to my mind. Yep, even before family. I've spent a lot of time with family since high school, but my life has been lacking in tubing time. Those of you that have been...back me up...it really IS one of the best pastimes on Earth. Am I right or am I right?

Originally, I thought we'd have to go all the way to Blackwater River or Marianna, but the boys are AWESOME and found the Choctawhatchee River runs right by us. They are so good that they planned rides to and from, scouted the river, Will called the Game Warden to assure us we weren't going to be eaten by gators, and we got REAL tubes from an 18 wheeler dealer. All I had to do was mention that I wanted to go, and the next thing I knew...

It was the first time we outnumbered the boys, and only one of us cried the whole day! I'm going to plead the fifth on who was the one to cry...it happens. I will say that no one saw said tears, and I, I mean 'she' was bleeding at the time. You would be right to assume that alcohol was involved, and dingdingding, I'm NOT pregnant!

While we sipped our beverages and took lots of #selfies, the boys bungee corded our convoy together. It was toolegittoquit with eight tubes, a floating couch to hold our dry stuff, and three coolers full of booze. We were livin' large on our redneck barge.

We all agreed that the best part of the whole day was the rope swing we came across, and it basically appeared out of nowhere like a gift from the man upstairs. Sure, we could have died in the shallow water, but it would have been soooo worth it.

I know, Will's backflip was more exciting, but he was Captain of our barge and had to show us all how it was done. Captain, Oh My Captain...lead us to more fun.

After four hours, we came to a bridge that wasn't the best stopping point, but we all knew that it was time to call it a day. We had another six miles to the next bridge, and six more miles floating lazily down the river would have taken far too long. We called our ride, hoped he could find us, and found ways to kill time. Will and I happened to take a 'walk' in the woods, which is where I got most of my bug bites, but it was so worth it. I'll never forget that 'walk', although I'll leave that part out when I tell this story to the grandkids. Either way, we came back in perfect timing to catch our ride and call it a day.

Technically, we all came home with massive bumps, bruises, bug bites, and hangovers, but there were no ER visits, zero lost phones-keys-wallets, and our ride managed to find us in the middle of nowhere with beer to spare, so I call it a win. Let's just say, we all agree that we will wait a bit before going again. Our livers and bodies in general need a break.

I Heart Salisbury Steak

Hi'ya, and Happy Belated Memorial Day!

Since the holiday, I have a sick hubby, a dirty house, fifteen loads of laundry, and so many bug bites that I look like I have the chicken pocks. I guess that means summertime is in full swing! I probably should be making summer-ish foods, but instead I've been on a soul food kick.

I took this Pinspiration, mixed it with a few others, and came up with a SUPER easy- MOUTH watering recipe. You can put it over rice, veggies, on a sammich...whatever works for you, but I paired it with Butter Beans from my uncle's garden, and lightened up mashed red potatoes with some cauliflower.  You could even go all mashed cauliflower, which is probably what I'll do next time. Without further ado...

Well, now that my mouth is watering, I'm going to enjoy the leftovers for breakfast. Let me tell ya, the leftovers are even MORE amazing than the first round if that's even possible. Now excuse me while I savor and put off clean the house for a little while longer.

How 'bout A Little Five For Friday Acción

UNO. I worked on my new Secretarial paperwork all week, and come to find out, the President didn't need any of it until next week. I got to email her back and say "Well actually, it's all finished already ;)". What can I say, I'm the best secretary EVER. Volunteer secretary, that is.

DOS. Father's Day is RIGHT around the corner. I already got my dad a combination Ladderball/Cornhole game because who doesn't want one of those, and then, THEN, I stumbled on these Sticky9 Instagram Refrigerator Magnets. My dad LOVES things like that, so I couldn't pass it up or the free shipping. If you need a Father's Day gift or just want your own, you could even use my code for 15% off: FRIENDWV2F. You're welcome.

TRES. Today, I find out if I'm pregnant. I don't actually think I'm pregnant, but my doc made me pee in a cup anyways. Like for real, I know I'm not pregnant, and to be clear- STILL NOT READY to be pregnant, but I did have a few butterflies in my tummy at the thought of being pregnant. I know you are all saying "Told ya so!", but I promise, the 'thought' is as far as I'm willing to go at this point. This too shall pass... if the test is negative.

CUATRO. It's really good that I'll get the test results today, because we are going to be drinking heavily while tubing down the river on Saturday! I haven't been tubing in far too long, so I am BEYOND excited. Like BEYOND...Totally going white girl on ya, because I "Like can't even".

CINCO. Since you asked (Well, Nicole asked), here is the floor lamp I made!

Long story short, my dad has learned to give me anything he has lying around, so I took this metal stand home, literally tied fabric on it {Pinspiration here}, tore apart an old table lamp, combined the two, and voila...I saved $100 smackers.

I may even pick up another lamp kit to light up the bottom too. Heck, before you know it, I'll just have random lamps all over my house.  As Buck and Will say, I'll totally be your Pinterest for hire! Peace out kids, I'm going tubin'!

My Latest Masterpiece: Dresser Repurpose

If you don't care about this tutorial, just scroll on down to see the finished product and tell me it's pretty. I spent a whole week on this thing, so I want confirmation that it was worth my time. Not that I don't get giddy every time I look at it, but you know what I'm sayin'.
Perhaps you remember this old dresser...

We actually bought that dresser for half off at Salvation Army, and it was meant to be a stand in until we decided on an entertainment console. Fast forward three years later, and we still haven't decided on new furniture. Well, I got tired of looking at it, so now that I have the 'spare time' to take on new projects it was time to revamp the eyesore.

The problem, was that this isn't even a real wood dresser, as in it's basically a step above Ikea. I knew there had to be a way to paint this god-awful mixture of laminate and particle board, so off to Pinterest I went. Yep, that means that I'm actually using the pins on my boards and not just pretending anymore! Really all you need to know, is that Primer is your friend, and it will allow you to paint anything your little heart desires. A lot of paint is made with Primer nowadays, but when we are talking about laminate and un-sanded surfaces, the real stuff is the way to go. Save yourself the freakout later when your paint starts bubbling up.

PRIMER || PAINT IN IVORY LACE || PROTECTIVE FINISH
**I also recommend going with water based products, because if you've ever tried to clean your brushes and pans, oil-based is a biatch to deal with. Along with those supplies, don't forget to pick up a little Paintbrush & Roller Kit. Mainly, you need a paint tray and a decent brush, but having a couple different sizes of foam rollers won't hurt either.**

Step #1
After you've laid down cardboard or tarp, remove the drawers/ hardware, clean all the surfaces, and get to priming. 

Oh hey, look...it's dark outside.
Time to pack it up and let it dry over night. Don't get scared, it only took less than an hour.

Step #2
Day two and three are for laying the color with drying time in between, and that's when you really feel like you are making the magic happen. If you are feeling froggy, you can even take a piece of sandpaper to the edges to distress them before putting on your Polycrilic. Just don't get too froggy or you will have to paint over your mistakes. Sidenote: You can also use the sand paper to get rid of any drips or mistakes along the way.

Step #3
Protect all your hard work with the Polycrilic finish. You have to be really careful with the water based version of this {and you may even want to try oil based}, but if you take your time, it turns out beautifully. It adds to the finish without discoloration or the heavy lacquered look.

Step #4
Decide what to do about the hardware, because the drawer pulls are the key to creating a full update. Surprisingly, this was the hardest part. The extra ones I had were the wrong size, I went to Lowe's and their selection was meh, and I searched Etsy but the prices were ridic, so finally, I realized I'd just have to make do with the originals. I decided that a little  Periwinkle Spray Paint would do the trick, especially since I already had another 'piece of crap art' that I desired to have Periwinkle. Inspired by this pin.

Gotta love killing two birds with one stone can of paint. So now we have some wall art, and I get giddy everytime I watch tv with my new entertainment center.

Whoops, I'm getting ahead of myself.
Step #...I forget, is putting the whole shebang back together.

And BAM...it's like a whole new dresser! Or shall I say Console?...Yeah, that sounds fancier.

I wanna pat myself on the shoulder, and say 'Git down wit yo bad self!'

Now, ask me about the Floor lamp I made. I'd love to tell ya about that one too ;).

Last but not least, I'm happy to announce that Jamie from Handling With Grace won The Coffee Doge giveaway, so let's give her a hand! This lil momma of two and fellow military spouse deserves a sweet treat, but thanks to everyone that participated!

I Don't Pay Full Price, Like EVER

I can picture Will reading this now... He's going to question why I didn't unveil my latest project {the one he demanded I post about today}, but unfortunately, that got a little labor intensive around midnight, so you are all just going to have to wait a little longer to see my newest masterpiece. Sleep is my friend, people.

Instead, I'm going to brag about the little shopping spree I went on yesterday. You see, Will and I give each other an allowance each month of 'fun money' to blow, and I have a hard time spending the money. Sure, I always like new clothes and what not, but the amount of clothes I already have is not conducive to Military moves. However, I have been trying to update my wardrobe to a wider variety of age appropriate and/or conservative items, which totally happened today, and it happened on CLEARANCE!

Up until yesterday, I didn't actually know that Altar'd State had physical stores, but boy was I happy with their Buy One, Get One 50% off Sale merchandise AND a 15% Military Discount! I walked out with four dresses and three rings for $130, when I would have spent $400+ full retail. On top of that, we stopped at Tar-Jay, and I picked up another four shirts on clearance, paying $40 for what would have been $110.This is why I DON'T pay full price people! 

Now let's talk about these rings. I had seen Midi rings, but had no clue what they were.  Let's just say name or no name, I'm obsessed. I think they are super fun, and I told Will that the arrow is the one that Cupid shot into my heart. Hey, you gotta love super cheesy reasoning for buying jewelry. I love any reason to buy jewelry.

So what do you think? Would you wear them? And more importantly...do you pay full price?

Now that I'm officially WAY past my bedtime, hope everyone has a fantabulous week, and come back Wednesday for the reveal! Promise this time.

I Fell In Love With His Sense Of Humor

And today, I will show you a peek into how he makes me laugh on a daily basis. Get some tissues, because you may laugh till you cry. Just sayin'.

Will: What are you doing?
Me: Documenting the funny shit you say for the blog.
Will: I never agreed to this, you trollop.
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Will: Where's the remote? Move your big butt.

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Will: When you're gone {read: dead}, I'm going to buy every car I've ever wanted.
Me: You know I plan on dying first, so what you do with the money is all on you.
Will: Don't worry, I'll leave them to your brother when I die.
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Will: You know how I know I love you? I went makeup shopping on MY Birthday.
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Will: So what is Universal gonna do with the Harry Potter park now that the movies are done?
Me: Um...it's never not going to be a 'thing'.
Will: But there aren't anymore books either?
Me: And you call yourself a Harry Potter fan, tsktsk. You think you know a guy...
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Will: I kinda love you.
Me: I kinda love you too.
Will: I know, I just have to keep you in check or you will get a big head.
Me: You better love me.
Will: Of course I do, remember that time in 2010 where I said I love you?
Me: You mean the time I told you I loved you and you didn't say it back?
Will: No that was 2008, and you sprung that on me. I meant the time we got married, now you are just making it weird.
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Will: I just need you to be cold, because if you're cold, I'm comfortable.
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Me: I don't get as mad like I used to because you've calmed me down.
Will: You're welcome.
Me: No, you're welcome.
Will: I feel like you walked me into that...

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Me: Have you ever been in a helicopter?

Will: How do you think we got everywhere while we were deployed?

Me: {Hangs head in shame} Wow...what a blonde moment.
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On the way to Denny's after we called the cops on our drunk neighbors...

Will: You can speed through here. All the cops are all at our house.
Buck: There were only 2 cop cars.
Will: That's all the cops Fountain has.
Upon reaching Denny's...

Will: The cops were just at my house.
The hostess: You must be doing illegal things at your house.
Will: What I do at my house is my business.
Hostess: Booth or table.
Will: Both.
Hostess: {takes us to a half booth with chairs}
Will: Well played, madam.

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Will: I wanna do pizza tomorrow night.
Me: Okie doke
A half hour later....
Will: And I want a burger.
Me: Ok
Will: But we can't do them in the same day.
Me: Well technically, we can get a cheeseburger pizza from Papa Johns'.
Will: Don't change the subject- I want Cheeburger Cheeburger. {exasperated sigh} Great, I'm not going to be able to sleep tonight thinking about Pizza and burgers!
Me: Good job, champ.
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Neighbor: {Revs engine}
Me: Seriously, where is he going?
Will: He's a 20 something year old man, he's going out. Calm down.
Me: {dumbfounded look}
Will: First of all, it's 9:30 and we used to go out late at night too. Second of all, quit acting like you are a 60 year old woman, and calm the eff down.
Me: Takes one to know one.
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Joel: Why do I burn myself on pizza EVERY time?
Will: I used to be that way, but since I don't have the fortitude to wait for pizza to cool on my own, my wife just won't let me have it until it's cooled.
Joel: If only I had someone to care about me that much.

And here's why I wonder how this SAHW thing will go...

Will: It's your responsibility as a SAHW to keep me fed.
Me: I'm still working for another month.
Will: FEED ME.
Will: Oh, and my second stipulation is that your uniform is a bikini.
Me: So what happens if I say no?
Will: You get a write-up.
Me: Three write-ups and I'm fired?
Will: No, silly. Three write-ups and you lose an article of clothing.
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Will: For the first time since I met you, I'll be making more money so you do as I say.

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Will: You need to stop stressing about the move, and start worrying about what you are making me for dinner.
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Will: You owe me big time, SAHW.

Me: Huh?

Will: I packed our moving truck in below zero temps.

Me: Exhibit A- I was outside packing and cleaning in zero temps too, and B- this move is for your career not mine.

Will: Well, I'm your boss now so my career pays your salary.
Me: Seriously?

On the flip side...

Will: {opens the fridge} You already bought and re-stocked beer?
Me: Yep.
Will: I apologize for underestimating you, madam.
Me: Don't let it happen again.
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Will: Woah...you're really painting.
Me: What did you think was going to happen after we shopped for paint and primer at Lowe's?
Will: I thought it was going to be a project we planned on doing that never actually happens.
Me: Now that I'm an SAHW I can do things like this.
Will: That is a very valid statement. I happen to love all of your projects, and I'm just happy that I don't have to be the one doing it.
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Will: Where are you going?
Me: To check the laundry, make you lunch, and set the coffee maker.
Will: That sounds like a lot of work.
Me: You are a lot of work.
Will: I find that it's a yin and yang kind of thing. I outweigh the negatives with the positives.
Me: One of the hardest jobs I have is keeping your negatives in check.
Will: That's why I married you. Duh.
At least he knows...

At least I can say that there is never a dull moment in our house. He's been making me laugh since 2007, and it's a good thing, because I find a sense of humor extremely sexy. 

How 'bout you?

Healthy IS Sexy

Did you know it's Women's Health Week?

With all of my trips to the doctors lately, I was pretty well informed about it, let me tell ya. I'm not going to preach at'cha today, but I thought I would like to share a few tidbits, and follow it up with a gift for your {wo}manly soul. Continue to read on to find out how ;)

...Some of you know that I was in a sorority in college, but what you don't know is that our philanthropy was ANAD or National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders. Thusly, anytime I see positive media for these diseases, I want to share. The one that struck me this week, was a new form of Before&After photos. I flippin' love it, because I'm all about women being healthy, and more importantly-beautiful, at whatever size works for each individual! Rock those curves, baby girl!

via

...The thing that scared the ish out of me this week was an article about Crossfit and Rhabdo. I don't do Crossfit, but I do love Resistance/Circuit training, and I have to remind myself that recovery is just as important as the actual workout. If you want to know more read the article, but basically, you should never push yourself too far and you should always give your body recovery time. With all the media pushing sexy is the new strong, we all need to remember that healthy is way sexier than kidney disease.

...The thing we are ALL affected by is Cancer. I just went for my skin cancer screening, and my Paps/Boobie check is next week. Ladies, there is no excuse to not be proactive when it comes to these things, so if you are reading this and haven't had these screenings- GET OFF YOUR @SS. Another Cancer you may have heard about is Mesothelioma, but if you are like me, you keep seeing it in the media and wonder what it is. It must be serious if I see it everywhere, so read more about it and get informed!

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Okay, so now that I've scared and yelled at you, I will make up for it by offering you free ish. I haven't had a giveaway around these parts in awhile, so I said yes when little Miss Rachel told me about pimping out her hubby and his new project. Pretty genius of them if you ask me, and you guys get to win a prize of your choice in the process. If you like Coffee and/or Starubucks, then this is for you! If you don't like coffee, there's always Passion Fruit tea...my fave.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

If you love love {I assume you do since my blog is significantly lovey dovey}, then check out this sweetie pie, Rachel. She talks about anything from recipes to traipsing around Europe, and I get lost in her life every time I visit her blog. It makes perfect sense that her hubby would create his own fun website for all of us coffee lovers. Moral of the story, whether you love love or coffee, they've got you covered.

Now go get a Pap Smear, and Happy Women's Health Week!

Pomp And Circumstance: WOCS Graduation!

I almost forgot that it was Military Spouse Appreciation Day, but I just have to send out a big hug to all my fellow Military Spouses! Each and every one of you has helped me or given me inspiration at some point whether you know it or not, and I'm forever grateful ;)

Now that I've been a Warrant Officer's wife for two weeks winkwink, it's time for the WOCS Graduation recap! This is going to be one of the biggest events of our history as 'The Bogerts' and our military career, and as if I haven't already been proud of my soldier, I'll just brag a little bit more share what continues to makes me so proud.

Perhaps I would have been nervous on the day of graduation, but eShakti was nice enough to save me the trouble of finding the PERFECT dress for the occasion, I was surrounded by family, and I knew that this was the only thing standing between me and my soldier coming home. Will was impatiently waiting for us at the museum too, and it was seriously adorable.

Sidenote: This might be my favorite picture of all time because these are the only three people in the entire world that love every fiber of me and have been there no matter what. They are also the three people I feel most blessed to know and to look up to.

With a few minutes to spare at the museum, we walked through the history of the new world we are entering into, and I felt my heart float in my chest with anticipation. The families were abuzz, the Army band was filling the whole place with good vibes, and the graduates were grinning from ear to ear. The day was here.

This ceremony was similar to other graduations and promotions we have attended, only this time, they brought in a General as the speaker, the prestige was evident, and Will was the superstar. Honestly, every time they said his name throughout the ceremony, it gave me chills. I don't even think he knew how important the Distinguished Leader Award was, but it was most certainly evident during the ceremony.

The general events of the ceremony were the speaker, awards, 'Pinning' the new rank on the soldier, and the installation of the new Warrant Officers. My MIL and I each got to pin on one side of his shoulder boards, and the good news is that I didn't trip! I pinned my sexy man in uniform, and then I was the one grinning from ear to ear.

I think the most significant thing for him, was receiving his first real salute from his Mother, the Senior Master Sergeant. My MIL has served twenty-two years in the armed services, and it might have been the epitome of her career, as well. I can only imagine the significance of saluting your own son. She created him having hope that he would grow up healthy and happy, and he's overcome every obstacle, thrived during any struggle, and surpassed all of her dreams. She might be the only person in the world that's more proud of him than me.

For those of you interested, I created a video with footage of all the graduation events to share with our family that couldn't be there. I get chills when I watch it, because I still can't believe that we went through all of this just a short time ago, and we have even more to look forward to. If you watch it, pay attention to my mad editing skills. I had to get pretty creative to squeeze hours worth of footage into fifteen minutes. You're welcome.

I would like to thank eShakti for introducing me to their amazing dresses, my friend Serge from Nuyoka & Co for helping me fine tune the video, thankful our family that traveled to be with us, and most of all...I'm grateful for my amazing hubby and real life Prince Charming.

But seriously...isn't this dress so cute? The print was totally out of my comfort zone, but now I wouldn't change a thing about the dress. As with all of their clothes, it's feminine, classy, well-made, and beyond reasonable priced. Did you notice the pockets? I flippin' love pockets.
Can't wait to order more for dress season!

Super heroes don't wear capes, they wear combat boots.

**Merchandise was provided by eShakti, but opinions are my own. No other compensation was rendered.**